Having fostered 50 children in 25 years, as well as bringing up her own two boys, and now helping with two grandchildren, some might think Helen Warren is looking forward to a bit of a rest – but not a bit of it!
She’ll be back at Lighthouse this Christmas to watch panto with her extended family, as she has done every year since 1998, and next year she’ll be at every performance of every show staged by Strictly Stage Theatre School.
“And all from the same row of seats,” says the friendly fostering ‘super mum’ from Canford Heath in between passing snacks and drinks to granddaughter Lily.
“We always sit at the back, in row X, as close to seat 32 as we can get. It started because we were conscious that our own children and foster children may need to move around or leave the performance due to their own needs. Equally, we didn’t want to disturb other theatre goers, and their enjoyment of what they were watching.”
For 27 years, since she first brought her eldest son to panto at the age of three, Lighthouse has been at the heart of her incredible care giving. Just as she found a love of live theatre after being taken to panto as a child, so did her sons. The youngest, Alex, is now a performing arts teacher at Strictly Stage Theatre School.
“And it’s not just the shows, we come to Lighthouse to have a coffee with friends, or to have lunch. When I first started coming here the café wasn’t on the ground floor it was upstairs. It has changed dramatically over the years, for the better I have to say!”
Helen is very clear that bringing the young people in the care of her and husband Ken to Lighthouse is central to their growth and all-round development. Over the past 25 years they have watched numerous children, from varying backgrounds and life experiences, turn their lives around, finish school and become happy, confident young adults.
“By giving them guidance, boundaries, love, action and consequences, the transformation can be incredible,” she explains.
“When you first bring a child to the theatre, it can be very intimidating, especially to looked after children. When you watch television, it’s in the confines of your own room, but it’s a completely different ball game when the television effectively comes to life on stage. For example, if you’ve got somebody in a panto that falls over, or a villain to be booed, these children can be on tenterhooks because they don’t know what to expect, they don’t understand. Are they hurt? Should someone help them?
“What we’ve found is that they grow to love the theatre and they become your next generation of theatre goers because they continue the passion of live entertainment. For us, it’s about creating new memories and experiences that will stay with them for life.”
Many of Helen’s young charges have gone on to appear on stage at Lighthouse having found a love of performing as well as watching live shows.
“It enables them to express themselves without being judged. I remember I had a phone call from a head teacher one day who told me they’d just heard a child singing. She’d never seen this child skip. Never seen this child sing. Never seen this child happy. Then one day she heard them singing.
“It started with a class at Strictly Stage Theatre School. That child grew and was adopted. They still love music, dance, theatre; they go to theatre all the time now.”
Like many of the children – and sometimes their parents as well – that have lived with Helen and Ken, that child has stayed in touch with them well into adulthood and as Helen shares stories about them her pride is palpable. It’s not long before the tears flow freely.
“Oh, I’m a crier! We feel it is hugely important to allow the child to flourish and thrive through their own passions, which is why clubs and activities are so important to each and every one of them. Encouraging a child to go on stage in front of 600 people and deliver a line, or sing, or dance, that’s a huge thing. That’s why I come to every performance of every show, and always will do, to show them support and appreciation of their hard work.
“I cry at every show!”
:: The UK is experiencing a crisis in recruiting and retaining foster carers, In the BCP region alone, out of 145 households that enquired about fostering in 2024, only five made applications. In the South East region, some 6,500 more carers that could help make a difference to a child’s life are needed.
To learn more about fostering that could transform the life of a child, visit:
BCP Fostering
https://www.bcpfostering.co.uk/Home.aspx
Independent fostering agency, Foster Care Associates https://www.thefca.co.uk/regions/south-east
For information on Strictly Stage Theatre School classes, visit
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